Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize