So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
