I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Randomize