Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize