HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
you will always have a special place in my vag
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Is it 3pm? Or am I losing my mind because it's pickled in vodka and diet coke?
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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