Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
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