i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
that's an acceptable place to lick
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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