no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
