Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I think people are normalizing furries
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
