The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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