Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
