Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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