she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Holy sore nipples Batman
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
