i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
