i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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