I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
