idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
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Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
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I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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