So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
Did I show you my penis last night?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
