Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Randomize
