i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
