Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
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