I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Got laid in my rudolph onesie for the second year in a row. New tradition? Absolutely.
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
