dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
