he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
