went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Sext me about skeletons
Randomize