He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
