used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
