Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Such a big mess for such a small penis
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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