the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
I see more hoeing in ur future
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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