Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
