I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
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