god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
My vagina just recognized that song.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
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