You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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