help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
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