Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
