so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
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