There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
