i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
