Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I smell like Dick and happiness
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
