you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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