Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
