Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
it's like heaven, but drunker
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
