6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
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