Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
