She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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