You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I've crashed the car, it's a write off. The police are here and I'm dressesd as a crayon.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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