he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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