Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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