My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
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