He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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