The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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